My hip started hurting about a month and a half ago.
During physical therapy, I had to do some random stretch.
“I kinda feel a pinch”
“Stop then”
Then the pinch did not go away. It just kept hurting.
I went to the Doctor, she said I strained my groin. Take some ibruprofen, it should be fine in two weeks.
Well I took ibuprofen, I kept taking ibuprofen, and then I used up the entire bottle.
Next thing I know, its been a month and a half, now that I am out of pain pills, it still hurts-except worse. Instead of just a pinch, its my whole right side, around my hip.
So I do to the doctor. New doctor, since I moved to San Francisco, I had to change. I am not driving 50 miles to see my doctor in San Jose.
We do a bunch of tests.
Nope, no, no, it just hurts. No. No exact point, it just hurts.
So we do some blood tests. Being that San Francisco is the liberal haven it is, she offers me a complimentary HIV test. Being the slut I am, more HIV tests can never hurt. Although I gave blood six months earlier, and I have only slept with one person since- and extra test can’t hurt.
So I get a call Monday morning.
“I got the results from your blood test, I need you to schedule an appointment this week to discuss the results.”
No one schedules an appointment if its negative.
So, naturally I think the worse.
I have HIV
And despite the fact that I took several other blood tests, my assumption was it is HIV.
FUCK
So of course, in my stress. I semi-accuse the one person who I have slept with. Which naturally, freaks him the fuck out. Which is fucked. I should have just kept my mouth shut until I got the results.
And then I go to the Doctor this morning.
I don’t have HIV.
I have an elevated White Blood Count. Which might mean an infection.
“No, I haven’t been sick”
“I need to do a pelvic exam then”
…Nothing.
“I am worried you might have an appendicitis. It could be this or this but it wouldnt explain the white blood cells… I need you to go to the ER. Today.”
“Are you serious?”
“Yes, I was worried before, but with these tests, you really need to go”
So I go to the ER.
Its San Francisco, there is no parking on the street and all the street parking is a 2 hour limit. I just did not feel right taking the bus to the hospital. Especially when there was no direct route.
I park in the $1+ per 30 minute garage.
Blood Tests. CT Scan. More Blood Tests. Wait for the results. Do you want pain pills? Emergency, you got pushed back. Drink this giant beaker of apple juice + mystery fluid for the CT. Sorry another emergency, you got pushed back. We have to wait for the results.
Naked, in a hospital gown, in a tiny room. Waiting.
5 and a half hours later, $17 in parking (that isn’t validated)
I am fine.
I go home.
My hip still hurts.
Fucking doctors.
